Who Has Time for Wellness?

The topic for this edition is “wellness.” Can I get real for a minute?

Wellness. Does anyone else feel like that’s a loaded word lately? The phrase, “take care of yourself” seems to get an eyeroll more often than not as educators struggle with the near-impossible balance of work, home and rest. As school counselors, we’re so tuned in to the needs of those around us that the signs of compassion fatigue often slip past us until we’re swimming in feelings of burnout. We spend our time digging through the depths of other peoples’ hurt: anxiety, abuse, neglect, self-harm, trauma, grief, suicidal ideation – trying to help one more student, fix one more problem before the last bell rings. Student needs are at an all-time high. The day ends and we’re exhausted, but still glancing at the never-ending list of to-dos. Wellness? Ha! Who has time?

If your experience is like that of mine and my co-counselors, you may have already found yourself hitting a wall. As we gathered one morning, we found we’d each had a moment the week before when we felt like we had nothing left to give. One said they couldn’t focus on the student in front of them. Another said their empathy was waning. I sat one day after school and cried. We all wondered if we were doing enough for our students, their families, and our staff. How are we supposed to “take care” of ourselves?

I have no profound answer to that seemingly rhetorical question, but I can offer you what we, here in my team, have found most helpful: grace. Grace not only to each other, but to ourselves. Grace to take a full lunch break, to close our doors for a while, to be honest and tag out when the load gets a little too heavy. Grace to not be the very best version of ourselves 100 percent of the time, to admit that we may not accomplish all those extra goals we set for this year. Grace to stop feeling guilty for setting boundaries we need. This is another unpredictable year in education, and expecting the very best of ourselves every single day is unrealistic. After all, if we’re always at our best, wouldn’t that then be considered our norm?

So, in the midst of buzzwords like “wellness” and “self-care,” I offer you reassurance and grace. You are not alone in this journey. When you close your office door at the end of the day, so do I, and so do 1,600 other school counselors across the state. When you’re questioning for the hundredth time if you’ve done enough today, you have. And you are. YOU are enough. 

The MSCA board and I hope you found peace and fulfillment over the holidays and continue to do so in the new year. And remember that you are enough as you are . . . so incredibly enough.

Contact Gen Nelson, MSCA Board assistant chair and ASCA Board member, at gennelson@nixaschools.net.